Popular Searches:
Jeremy Yaffe, born in 1937 in Massachusetts, is Alan Arkin’s first wife and mother to actors Adam and Matthew Arkin. After their 1961 divorce, she retrained as a nurse in California, focusing on raising her children independently. She’s now 88, living a private life away from Hollywood’s spotlight, a choice she made as the first wife of actor Alan Arkin.
Jeremy Yaffe was born in 1937 in Massachusetts to parents George and Ninna Yaffe. She grew up in a stable, supportive household that emphasized education and personal development. Her early years were comfortable—her family even employed household help, including a maid named Irene Giovannini.
Most people know her as Alan Arkin’s first wife. But reducing her life to that single fact misses the larger story. She’s a woman who rebuilt herself after divorce, raised two successful sons as a single mother, and chose a career helping others instead of chasing Hollywood connections.
At 88 years old, Jeremy lives in California. She’s spent decades maintaining her privacy, declining interviews, and avoiding the public eye. That choice tells you something about her values.
Jeremy attended Bennington College in Vermont, where they explored creative interests in music and dance. The school attracted students with artistic ambitions, and that’s where she met Alan Arkin.
He was 21. She was 18. They were both trying to figure out who they wanted to become.
Their relationship developed quickly. When they decided to marry in December 1955, the college administration wasn’t pleased. Young marriages during school years were frowned upon, particularly at institutions focused on creative and academic achievement.
They left Bennington together and moved to New York City without clear plans. Within weeks, Jeremy discovered she was pregnant with their first child.
Alan struggled to find acting work. To support his young family, he joined The Tarriers, a folk music group. The band found success—they co-wrote and performed “The Banana Boat Song,” which charted in 1956. The group toured extensively in Europe, and eventually, Jeremy and their son, Adam, joined Alan on the road, becoming part of the entertainment industry.
Their second son, Matthew, was born in March 1960. By then, the financial pressure had become unbearable. Alan wrote in his memoir that Jeremy’s anxiety about money intensified after Matthew’s birth. The stress of constant instability, moving between cities for work, and raising two young children with inconsistent income took its toll.
In 1961, Jeremy left with the children. The marriage ended after six years, marking the end of her journey as the first wife of actor Alan Arkin.
The divorce wasn’t about a lack of love or dramatic conflict. It was about survival.
In the early 1960s, divorce carried a significant social stigma, especially for women. Jeremy faced the reality of supporting two young sons without financial security. Alan’s acting career was still uncertain—he wouldn’t achieve major Hollywood success until later in the decade.
She had to make a choice: continue hoping circumstances would improve, or take control of her situation. She chose the latter.
After the divorce, Jeremy made a decision that would define the next five decades of her life. She went back to school to train as a registered nurse.
This wasn’t random. Nursing offered stable employment, decent pay, and flexible hours—critical for a single mother. It also aligned with her values. She wanted work that meant something, that helped people, that gave her independence.
She moved to California and built a nursing career. Records show she worked as a registered nurse until her medical license expired in 2012. That’s roughly 50 years in healthcare.
Think about what that means. While her ex-husband won an Academy Award and her sons built Hollywood careers, Jeremy spent her days caring for patients. She chose substance over spotlight.
Jeremy raised Adam and Matthew primarily on her own during their crucial developmental years. Both boys would eventually follow their father into acting, but their foundation came from their mother.
Adam Arkin, born in 1956, became an accomplished actor and director, best known as the son of actor Alan Arkin. He earned Emmy nominations for roles in “Northern Exposure,” “Frasier,” and “Chicago Hope.” His directing credits include “Succession,” “Sons of Anarchy,” and “Masters of Sex.”
Matthew Arkin, born in 1960, initially practiced law for five years before transitioning to acting. He’s appeared in films including “Liar Liar” with Jim Carrey and “Margot at the Wedding” with Nicole Kidman. He also teaches acting and writes.
Both sons have spoken about the complex family dynamics of their childhood—frequent moves, multiple household configurations, and the challenges of having parents in different cities. Matthew told The New York Times in 2000: “My life was crazy: a lot of divorces, a lot of moving between different configurations of family.”
Jeremy provided the constant support that allowed them to thrive in their careers in nursing and acting. While Alan pursued his career and remarried (twice more after Jeremy), she maintained the home base. She worked full-time, managed household responsibilities, and ensured her sons had opportunities to develop their talents.
When Alan cast Adam in his Oscar-winning 1969 short film “People Soup,” Jeremy supported the decision even though it meant her 13-year-old entering the same unpredictable industry that had contributed to her divorce.
She didn’t try to steer her sons away from entertainment. She gave them the stability to take risks, which was crucial for their careers in the entertainment industry.
Both Adam and Matthew have had long, respected careers. Adam’s net worth is estimated at around $10 million. Matthew’s is similar. They’ve raised children of their own, including Molly and Emmet Arkin, making Jeremy a grandmother.
Her influence appears in how they approach their work—with professionalism, consistency, and an apparent balance between career and family, much like the values instilled by their mother, known as the first wife of actor Alan Arkin.
Jeremy remarried at some point after her divorce from Alan, though she’s kept details private. One source mentions she had remarried by the time Alan’s obituary was published, and another suggests she was single when Matthew was profiled in 2000. The timeline isn’t entirely clear, which seems intentional, perhaps reflecting the desire for privacy often associated with the ex-wife of a public figure.
She’s lived in California for decades. Unlike many people connected to Hollywood families, she’s never capitalized on those connections. No memoir. No interviews. No reality TV appearances or celebrity offspring publicity.
When Alan Arkin died in June 2023 at age 89, Jeremy was still living. She was 86 then, navigating her life away from the limelight while still being known as the first wife of actor Alan Arkin. The press coverage focused on Alan’s achievements, his later wives, and his children’s statements. Jeremy remained in the background, as she’d chosen to be for 60 years.
Her legacy isn’t measured in awards or public recognition. It’s measured in different terms.
She raised two sons who’ve contributed meaningfully to their field for decades. She built a healthcare career that likely touched hundreds or thousands of patients. She demonstrated that you can be connected to fame without needing it yourself.
In the 1960s, divorced single mothers faced harsh judgment and limited options. Many women in her position struggled financially and socially. Jeremy retrained for a stable profession, moved across the country if needed, and created a new life.
That took guts. It took planning. It took work.
She’s also an example of knowing when to leave—the marriage, the public eye, the expectation that being associated with famous people means you should seek attention too.
Jeremy Yaffe’s story matters because it’s real. It’s not a Hollywood narrative with a neat arc. It’s the story of someone who made hard choices, adapted when necessary, and prioritized her values over external validation.
She was 18 when she married Alan Arkin, 24 when she divorced him, and spent the next six decades building a life that had nothing to do with red carpets or movie premieres. She worked in hospitals. She raised her children. She kept her personal life personal, maintaining a distinction between her public persona and her role as the ex-wife of a famous actor.
In a culture obsessed with visibility, Jeremy Yaffe chose invisibility. And there’s something admirable about that—about being content with a meaningful life that doesn’t require an audience.
Her sons succeeded in Hollywood, following in the footsteps of their father, actor Alan Arkin. Her ex-husband became a legend. And Jeremy, like his brother Adam, found his path in the entertainment industry. She became a nurse, a mother, and someone who understood that not every life needs to be public to matter.
